Honestly-- It’s the Best Policy

Today’s topic is a very important one. One we should have learned in kindergarten—lying is bad. Honesty (if done tastefully) is good. I’m not saying that we all need to be crazy blunt either, but don’t lie b/c it’ll come around to bite you in the butt.


I covered this before in previous posts about creating a profile and writing an introductory message, but it’s important to present in a positive light but to not exaggerate or misrepresent yourself. If you lie about your age, weight, education, hobbies, the other person’s gonna figure it out, so pure and simple, be yourself…unless you plan on never letting the other person see your driver’s license or visit you at work, but that sounds like too much work.

When it comes to telling someone that you aren’t interested, there are a couple of ways to approach this too. You can do the classic, not going to respond method. But I find it a bit shady. If it’s a first message, then not responding is pretty typical but if you’ve been corresponding for a while, and especially if you’ve actually met or are in a relationship then by all means, tell them that you don’t think the relationship isn’t what you’re looking for or something like that. Don’t blow them off when they call, or text or email. Don’t treat them like an ass until they break up with you, b/c that’s just complete douchery. Have the balls to just tell the truth b/c then especially if you tell them (in as nice a way as possible) why the relationship won’t work, maybe they can take that information and work on it.

When you close a match in Eharmony, it asks you why you closed it. Generally people cop out and put “other” as the reason. This tells me nothing. It may honestly be other, but if you put something like, “you’re too old for me” or “there isn’t any chemistry” at least I have something to work off of. Of course if I’m a year older than you and you say I’m too old for you, you’re still a douche. (A friend of mine said that a woman told him he lived too far away when they lived in the same city and I’m not referring to Los Angeles, I’m talking about a normal city!) So put a reason, but make it a legit reason, not some BS-y one.

Ok, so this is really sorta a topic of honesty and also not lying when you blow someone off.

Sorry about the rambling, tomorrow will be a more concrete topic, making the first phone calls (or other non-online contact)!